Anyway, we had some quality conversation and cuddle time, and then when his words began to get further and further apart, and he was yawning every other breath, I just got quiet, and soon he was out like a light. He had been holding my hand when he was talking, and he continued to hold it as he was sleeping. We had been lying on our sides facing each other while we'd been talking, and the sounder he went to sleep, the more burrowed into me he became - still holding my hand.
As I laid there, Davis pressing into me on one side, and Spooky pressing in on the other, I breathed it in deeply. Cause that's truly what it's all about. Those are life's beautiful moments. It didn't matter that lots of things got left undone because we had to lay down and have the lights out by 8, it didn't matter that I didn't get the reading, journaling, blogging, emailing, etc done that I had planned to do last night before he came in asking if we could have a sleepover. It didn't matter that as I laid there sandwiched between them that I felt like my skin was going to melt off cause I was so hot, and I couldn't get my hands loose to throw the cover off. All that mattered was lying there and enjoying that precious time with that child. Cause those moments are gone all too soon...
As I think to all the times during his life (and Samantha's) that I've had the opportunities to love on them, hold them, cuddle them, hug them, kiss them, breathe them in...I sit back in awe. Because here's the truth of it. I love these kids. I love them with every breath that is in me. I want them to have the very best this world has to offer, and the best God has in store for them. I want them to grasp every concept way earlier than I did, I don't want them to hurt, but when they do, I hurt with them. I get upset with them when they don't obey, and get frustrated when I know/see/hear them doing things they shouldn't be doing, but I love them even through that.
...How much more does God do all of that with each of us?
Just sit on that one a minute.
God loves you so much, he aches for you. He wants to be a part of your life. He doesn't just want you to talk to Him during set times of "quiet time" or "prayer time" but He wants you to include Him ALL day long! He's even better than WalMart, cause He doesn't even close on major holidays! 24/7/365 - He's there for YOU!!! He wants to hear YOUR voice! Singing, praying, rambling, processing - He doesn't care! Think of the times where you have just sat in the same room with your children and/or parents - aren't there times when nothing has to even be said - you're just in their presence, and that's more than enough! He's the GOD OF THE UNIVERSE!!! And yet, He still wants that with each of us! He just wants us to welcome Him into our presence, and He wants us to long to be in His!
His arms are open wide!
RUN IN!!!
RUN IN!!!
And the best part is, that just like the picture above, He doesn't expect us to come up to Him - He gets right down here with us, and embraces us right where we are! We don't have to be perfect! We don't have to be be mistake-free! We just have to want Him and desire Him more than we want or desire anything else! (And the beautiful thing there is, that even if you're not completely to that point, all you have to do is let Him know you'd like to get there, and He'll even help you with that!)
What an incredible Daddy He is!!! :D
Rest in His arms this week . Don't worry. Don't fret. He wrote, directed, produced, and previewed the movie that is your life - so if you have issues, take them to Him! :)
I love you all!
