Well, duh!

Ok...I think in the last update I promised that I would soon share with you some of the stuff that God has been planting in my heart...so here goes (and then we'll get to the other good stuff! :D )

If you've known me for a while, you should know that I LOVE children, and I LOVE the elderly, it's just those "in-between" ages that throw me for a loop. Some of my favorite memories are from working in the nursery at the various churches I have attended, volunteering at the daycare for the children of the NEGMC employees and volunteering at New Horizons North (the nursing home on Limestone Pkwy in Gainesville). There is just something so awesome about people in those two age categories - and there is sooooooooooooo much to learn from them, as well! I have always had a special net cast around me when it comes to dealing with teenage females (even when I was one) - they are just a different breed of human, and for me and my personality, it takes a lot for me to reach them, cause I just don't understand them - all of the drama, upheaval, he said/she said, fussing, feuding, etc. Maybe the problem is that since I spent a lot of time playing at Mama's office, with her and her coworkers while they were working, that I never really went through that phase.

I have always felt quite a bit older than others my age - sidenote: when writing "the list" with God this summer on the future husband, the line regarding age that He allowed me to write down was, "If he is younger than me, or the same age as me - he will be mature beyond his years." (I wanted to put "older than me" but He wouldn't allow that :P) I just haven't had much luck finding guys that are my age, that are quite on the same wavelength with me... As I told Mama this summer when she was here and we were having this conversation - I feel like a 30-40 something, with a 23 year old's birthdate. I'm thinking about settling down with husbands, houses, children and ministry, and most people my age are thinking about school, dating, networking, and what they're doing this weekend. I'm just not there. And I really never have been.

Saying all that to say this : God has planted a PASSION - an URGENT passion - for girls (12-18 specifically) to give them the message that God has given me this summer, and during the writing of the book. I don't know all the details of what it's gonna look like, or how it's gonna shape up, I just know it's supposed to happen. And I know it is definitely a God thing, because I NEVER would have chosen such a thing on my own. But, in true God fashion, now that it's in my heart, I'm totally on fire and ready to go with it! :)

And now for the "Well, duh!" moment... :)

Many of you may already know what I'm about to tell you. It might be rooted deep in your heart, and it might just have been a fleeting thought on a cold dark night when you were alone looking at the stars. For me, I've heard it MANY times through the years, but it just took root over the past week or so.

Are you ready? :)

I am here, because God has a purpose for me.

Haha! :) How do you like that? Did you realize that? Do you realize and understand that NOTHING you do in this life is insignificant?

Get ridiculous with me for a moment:

I need to eat breakfast. In the cabinet, I have cereal and I have muffins. I am really craving cereal, but there's just enough milk for my cereal, and I am supposed to be making a dish for dinner that requires milk. So, if I eat the cereal and use the milk, I will have to go to the store and buy more milk, or I could just have the muffins. I decide that I really want the cereal, and I'll just make the trip to the store. So I have my breakfast, and head to the store. When I get to the store, I run into a girl I haven't seen since graduation. We stop and talk for a while, and she tells me about how she just doesn't feel like she's getting anywhere. She doesn't feel like she's accomplished anything, and wonders if she ever will. I take the time to stop and talk to her, share my story with her, allowing her to see how God used the things I thought were pretty insignificant and turned them into something pretty amazing. Then I pray with her, and we part ways. I get to the end of aisle and run into the lady from church that is in charge of VBS. I ask her how things are going with sign-ups and she explains that she is still looking for someone to handle supper, and needs someone to help out with the physical activity portions of each evening. I tell her that I'll be happy to help with the suppers, and I'm sure Mama would be happy to help as well, and then tell her that I'll talk with my aunt who is a PE coach and see if she'd be interested in helping with the activities. She thanks me for offering and we part ways, with me assuring her that I'll get back with her by the end of the day to confirm everything. I finally make it to the milk, pick up my gallon and head to the counter. On the way, I pass the display of cards, and I remember that my friend's birthday is in a few days, and I pick up a card and a gift and to the counter I go. When I get there, my cashier looks like she just lost her best friend, so I greet her with a smile, hello and a sincere "How are you doing?" She answers, telling me that her grandmother was put in the hospital last night, and they don't know if she's going to make it to the end of the week. I tell her how sorry I am to hear that, then (looking at her name badge) call her by name, and tell her that I will be praying for her family during this time. She thanks me, and has a slight smile on her face as I go on my way.

Yes...I am aware that was a rambly story. But look at what I just encountered:
1 - The girl from high school that was feeling down and out, but left feeling an uplift in her spirit, and knowing that there was someone else out there that had been down the same path
2 - The stressed VBS coordinator who left feeling light, knowing that she was able to cross a few things off of her extremely long list of to dos.
3 - The hurting cashier, who was worried and anxious, but now knows that someone out there cared enough to call her by name, and is now carrying some of her burden.

...and all that because I chose to eat cereal for breakfast. :)

Do you get it???? Please tell me you do! :D

EVERYTHING MATTERS!!! There is NOTHING that does not matter! The fact that I am sitting here typing this blog matters. Because I fully believe that God is going to use this and touch someone's heart! He's going to do to you what He's been doing to me this week! :) I promise you that your ENTIRE world will turn upside down when you realize that you are still walking this earth, only because God isn't finished with you! :) Your life truly has a purpose! And every part of your life somehow impacts something else! :) I am so pumped right now just typing it!!! :D I want this to light a fire under your tushy! :) Not to make you turn into some psycho that doesn't do anything without analyzing it completely because you have to make sure that it's going to have a grand impact on the world, but instead, to make you want to live your life as fully and completely and energetically as possible, so you can make the most impact.

Don't worry your life away. And don't overthink. If you get an urge (of course, I'm assuming that you understand the difference in "good" urges and "bad" urges :) ), do it. If you have the urge to take your children/grandchildren to the park and play for a while. Make the time and do it. If you have the urge to cook a romantic dinner for your spouse/fiance DO IT! If you have the urge to run up to a friend and give them a HUGE hug - DO IT! If you have the urge to pay for the couple's dinner that's sitting across the restaurant - DO IT! If you have the urge to send a card to a friend that you haven't gotten to talk to lately - DO IT! If you have the urge to visit a friend or family member you haven't seen in a while - DO IT! God WANTS to use YOU to bless OTHERS!!! :D All He wants from you is a willing heart - He'll provide the rest. He'll stretch the hours in your day, stretch the dollars in the bank, stretch the love in your heart. Let Him. :)

I'll step down from my soapbox now... :)

At the Anne Graham Lotz seminar, at the end of one of the talks, she asked for those to stand up that knew God was calling them to something and they were having a hard time saying yes and doing it. For perhaps the first time in my life, I didn't have to stand up! :D Can I tell you how awesomely amazing that moment felt for me? As I sat there, tears pouring down my face, realizing that, for right now anyway, I've got it! I'm following after Him as hard as I physically can, and in the moments I can't do it anymore, I tell Him He's gonna have to carry us both, and not just hold my hand as I go through it! And He does! He picks me up, holds my head close to His heart and runs through the fire for me! :)

I was sharing with a friend on Friday, how I believe if I went through my God-journals (to explain that category, I have my journals to God, my journal to the Future Husband, my "dream" and "todo" journal... :) ), that the thing that would come up more than anything, would be the times that I am completely wrapped up in Him, and I can physically feel His arms around me - whether it be at church, LifeGroup, in my room, the living room, in the car, at work, wherever! There are times when I feel His hands on my shoulder. Where I feel his arms around my back, where I feel his legs under mine, and his chest against my back, and know that I am sitting in His lap. He is REAL, y'all! He is HERE! And all He wants is us to love Him more than we love anything else - more than our spouses, children, family, friends, wealth, career, health, favorite pasttime - He wants us to love Him first. He doesn't want our leftovers. Don't get me wrong, He'll take whatever you give Him, and He'll take it happily. But the joy you'll experience from giving to Him first will never be matched anywhere else.

And another lesson is this: it doesn't matter how you get with God. You don't have to have a specific place, or time, or day. You don't have to have your eyes closed. You don't have to read your Bible. You don't have to listen to "God music." No doubt that all those things can sometimes help you "get" there. But you can have moments with God wherever, whenever! He is ALWAYS with you!!! He's just waiting on you to get it! :)

I have a lot more I intended to type up, but I think that this is what I want to leave you with right now. God loves you. He wants all of you. And it's true - you can never out give God. You give Him all of your heart, and you'll find that you have more love in there than you ever thought you have. You give Him your worries, and you'll find you're more "go with the flow" than you've ever been. You give Him your regrets and past hurts, and He'll redeem them - He'll use them through you to help others! You give Him your finances and He'll bless others and you through it! He's all over it! :)

I love you all! :)

More to come, soon! :)