Promised Pictures: Wedding Shower

The beautiful candle display Connie found! :) It was in the hallway.

The table at the entry to the room we had the shower in.

The fruit display - complete with white chocolate seashells! :)

Our "F" - and our "R" and "V"

Made me VERY happy! :)

The yummiest punch EVER! :) The "froth" was the best part!

Sand castles - yes, they MADE sandcastles! It is a recipe where you mix sand with...cornstarch...I think... Anyway, they turned out BEAUTIFULLY! They also had some seahorses, fish and crabs! Totally cute! :)

The table centerpieces

Our beautiful hostesses

Kim, Joy, Brandy and Connie

Striking their "Curves" pose! :)

Connie and Mema Mary (her mama)

Mema and Papa surprised us and drove over from Chatsworth for the shower! :)

Wonderful surprise! I love my in-laws! :)

Kim and Papa Charlie

Heather and I

Warning: Disaster Area Ahead! Proceed with Caution! :)

First off, let me just start off by saying, that as of today, we are officially ONE MONTH from wedding day. Wow...

And the title...well, just ask Mama - that is the sign that should have gone before me for the past two months! :) As I've been sorting, packing, moving and working on wedding stuff... But now at least one of the two homes I've been stringing between is all cleaned up and peaceful once again! :) (Mama's very excited about that! :) )

The past two months have been filled with all kinds of stuff - mostly good... :) We have planned the wedding of my dreams - a labor of love by everyone involved. And have moved all my stuff (except clothing and stuff I will be needing for the next month) from Demorest to LaFayette. And Ryan and I have been working dilligently to mesh our two worlds together in our home - another labor of love... :)

Last Sunday we had our first wedding shower, and it was beautiful! I will admit, that I don't usually care very much for attending showers, as they are usually very chaotic, and you can't see or hear what's going on, it's loud, and basically, it's just very unorganized. However, this shower was great! Majorly in part to the ladies that were hosting - my mother-in-law-to-be, Connie; her sister and my pastor's wife, Kim; our music minister and family friend, Joy; and my incredible friend, and bridesmaid, Brandy. There was just a peace and calmness in the room, that I can't even explain... It was just incredible. And incredibly beautiful! I'll have to post pictures! We were showered with love, support, encouragement, prayer, and of course, gifts! :) We got some incredible stuff! It's almost as if they could see into my brain, as the items we received were all my "top picks" off the registry! :) Yay! :)

Tomorrow is our reception gathering thing at Ryan's grandparents' (Connie and Kim's parents) land in Chatsworth. I'll be getting to meet his extended family for the first time. So, I'm excited about that! :) Mama is headed over here this evening, to spend a little time with us before tomorrow - so of course I'm excited about that, as well! :)

Wednesday, I got our bedroom painted! And it's beautiful, if I do say so myself...and I do! :) I'll have to post pictures of it as well! :) I'll do that after Ryan hangs everything for me this evening - he's quite the handyman! :)

Anyway, I think I've rambled on enough, but at least I've gotten you a little bit caught up! :) I'll give more wedding details later, and I'll post pictures of the shower here soon! :)

Love you all!

Life is changing...and I couldn't be happier! :)

So...it hasn't been too long since I wrote last, but I promised a picture...and now I have even more news! :)

A big "Thank You" to Mama for taking the pictures for us! :)

These are two of my favorites from the short shoot! :)

Friday, Ryan made the trek from LaFayette to Demorest/Cornelia/Baldwin to meet the family! :) He came and picked me up, and we headed out to Papa and Nanny's so he could meet them first, and so we'd be able to have a little more conversation than we would if we had just seen them over dinner! :) He got the grand tour of the yard and house, and gave it his stamp of approval! :) Yay! :)

We left Papa and Nanny's and headed to Gusben's to meet up with the rest of the clan - Mama, Marcia, Diane, Dudley, of course, Papa and Nanny, the Bettys and Doris Ann. (This past weekend was family reunion weekend, so we had 3 more in attendance than usual! :) )

After enjoying a wonderful meal, we headed over to Marcia's for our after dinner talk and dessert, giving Dudley a chance to talk to Ryan. :) Which he'd been waiting to do for a while now! :) Marcia's is where we took the pictures you have been provided with. :) So, a thank you to Marcia for allowing us to use her yard! :)

We headed back to Demorest after dessert, and went for a walk on the bridge across the used-to-be-lake at Piedmont, but that got cut short when the bottom fell out of the sky, and onto us! :) We headed home, with my straight turned crazy-curly hair, where I promptly changed into the most comfortable clothing I own! :)

We sat in the living room for a while, and talked with Mama. Chalupa wasn't much of a conversationalist...he just curled up next to Mama, and promptly went to sleep! :) It was after midnight, before Mama encouraged Ryan to get on to the Davis' so he could get some sleep. So, I reluctantly walked him out to his car.

And it was there, under the streetlamp, with me with my crazy-curly hair, wearing the most comfy and unattractive clothes I own, that he proposed! (And yes, he had asked for Mama's blessing, and she gave it completely!) :D And of course I said yes! :)

If you know my heart at all, you understand how incredibly perfect our proposal was. Just the two of us. Not on a holiday. Not some monstrous gesture. Simple. And absolutely perfect. And for him to love me enough to want to commit to me even when I have the crazy-curly hair, and the comfy-baggy clothes on...a dream come true, and the icing on the cake!!! :)

He loves me right where I am, just as I am. And that, to me, has been the most amazing part of this whole experience. He has seen me at my worst - and he still wants to share his life with me. :)

I cannot wait to see what God has planned for this next season of our lives! :) If it's anything like the past month, it's going to be an incredible journey! :)

I love you all! :) Thank you for all of your kind words, encouragement and support! :) I know I keep repeating myself, but it still makes me so incredibly happy that you all are so happy for us! :) So I must keep repeating myself, so you understand how blown away I am by your continuous love and support! :) Thank you! :)

What a Wonderful World... :)

It has been a month and a half since I last sat down to write anything for you all. And in that time, God has done incredible things! :) He truly is an awesome God! And He knows me like no other! :)

I'm pretty sure I told you about the youth trip in the last update, but just in case I didn't - know I'm not going to take the time to go back and read to see if I did or not... :) - the church was incredible enough to provide for us to take the youth on a retreat - "Spring Renewal" - to Gatlinburg, Tennessee the first weekend in June. We had 16 youth and 6 chaperones - yes, our ratio was pretty good! :) Heath, Brandy, Aaron, Ryan, Mama and I were the ones blessed enough to get to attend the weekend.

Thursday night, before we left on Friday, Nanny was wonderful enough to give up the majority of her evening to me, and helped me in gathering all the groceries for the weekend. We closed Ingles down that night. :) We wound up with 3 carts FILLED with everything imaginable! And Papa, bless his heart, waited out in the van for her the entire time! (In our defense, we thought he had gone on home...but in the end, it was really good he stayed, because Nanny would have had to hang off the hood or something if I was going to take her home... My car was PACKED!!! :P )

We all (but Mama and 3 of the boys that had to work until 5ish) met at the church 12ish on Friday. We filled them with pizza, and then loaded up! Heath and Brandy took the first 13 youth on the van (they're the only ones of us old enough to drive the van...but my time is coming up quickly... :) ). Aaron, Ryan and I followed in Aaron's car - he was gracious enough to drive up the incredibly long mountain - I may be incorrect, but I'm fairly certain it took us almost 5 hours to make it from Habersham to Gatlinburg... It might be that I'm just used to riding with Mama... :) ...but I don't think it has EVER taken us that long to make the trek to Gatlinburg/Pigeon Forge. But the ride was fun...and very entertaining, so it really didn't seem like very long at all! :)

We made it to the our beautiful cabin (that I am only realizing now that I didn't take any pictures of...sad day...) and began the unloading process. It's amazing how quickly things get done when you have that many people helping! :) The kids wanted to head straight down to the pool, of course, so Brandy and Heath offered to stay back and start grilling the burgers, while Aaron, Ryan and I accompanied the kids to the pool. I went fully clothed, with no intention of getting wet, and just sat on the edge with my feet in. (Of course, I got soaked... :P ) But as I was sitting there, watching the kids, Brandy came running up wielding her camera, and almost out of breath. Turns out, she and Heath had started the grills up (we had two going), and she went to go in the house to get the meat. When she went to go up on the porch, she saw a bear statue standing by the driveway, and thought to herself, "I don't remember seeing that when we got here..." About the time that sentence ran through her head, the "statue's" head moved, and she realized it was not a statue... :) She ran back to Heath, and they jumped inside the van and waited him out. He went and sniffed all around the grills, but thankfully the meat wasn't out there yet, and he went on his way. So she had jumped in Aaron's car and come down to the pool to tell us to be careful walking back! :) We never saw the bear anymore, but everyone stayed on alert the rest of our stay! :)

We eventually got dinner to the table, and all piled into the kitchen/dining room for a filling meal - to the belly, and the heart. I loved just standing back and watching the kids interact with one another. I love those guys! :) When we finished, everybody just kind of hung out. We had some playing cards, some listening to music, some watching a movie in the theater (yes, we had a 14 seat theater in the cabin! :) ), and some of us just sitting around Aaron and his guitar, singing praise and worship songs, and some older hymns. It was just an incredibly relaxing evening! :) And I enjoyed every moment of it!

Mama and the three other boys arrived 10ish, and we promptly started our evening service. We had a great time of worship, and sharing, then we headed into the kitchen for smore's (we made them over the stove top... :) works like a charm!) As we were standing around in the kitchen, I was talking to some of the girls, and asked if they'd ever played "Chubby Bunny." A few answered in the affirmative, and a few others had no idea what we were talking about, so I showed them... And got something started. :) Before we knew it, we had an all out competition going on! We played Friday and Saturday night, and we wound up with a girl champion (Brandy) that got 12 marshmallows in (they were the jumbo ones, by the way), and a guy champion (Harley) with 13! It was terribly disgusting, but extremely funny! :)

The next day was a pretty great day. We had given the kids a challenge Friday night to offer their life to God, to ask him to break us, and rebuild us into what he would have us be. We had tea cups/coffee mugs double bagged in ziploc baggies, and I asked them to think and pray about it overnight, and told them that we would break them the next morning, if they so chose to. However, we stressed to them that we did not want them to break it unless they were absolutely certain they were ready for God to do His will in their lives. Some came and got their mugs that night, others waited until the morning. But several of them took markers, and wrote things that God was hilighting for them, that He wanted to break away. I was so proud of them for taking it a step further! :) So, on Saturday morning, we gave them an opportunity to go out in the driveway, and smash their cups. And smash they did! :) After that, we broke up. The guys went outside, and the girls piled into the theater for a time of open communication. We wound up staying upstairs for over an hour, I do believe, and it was INCREDIBLE!!! God is definitely moving in these girls!

Saturday night, we gathered outside around the fire pit for service. We had put out a "question box" Saturday morning, and asked the kids to write down any questions they might have, put them in the box, and we would answer them that night. And we had all kinds! :) We had worship first, and it was wonderful. To hear all the voices lifting up, into the heavens, as we stood outside under the stars... What a moment! :) We had the Q&A time, and we wound up being out there for a few hours. But it was great! :) We ended our time together in a linked up (hooking arms instead of holding hands - hands sweat, but elbows don't! Well...not as bad as hands do, anyway! :D ) prayer. It was just an incredibly sweet time of family and fellowship.

After our Saturday evening game of Chubby Bunny, the kids all headed to their mutual corners, with Aaron and Ryan headed down for bed as well. Heath, Brandy, Mama and I stayed in the kitchen and talked for a while (turned into a couple of hours... :) ). However, in the middle of our conversation, Ryan came upstairs announcing that there was a "Stage Four Bear Alert." The boys were downstairs claiming that there was a bear throwing rocks at the cabin. And Ryan was on it to check it out. Long story short, the "bear" was the girls... Our cabin was three stories, girls on top, boys on the bottom (with Aaron and Ryan) and Heath, Brandy, Mama and I blocking off the middle. :) The girls were out on their balcony, breaking the little hotel bars of soap into very small pieces, and throwing them down to the boys deck! Aaron and Ryan were the ones that finally figured out what was going on, after doing a bit of undercover work - all this only lasted about 20 minutes, but it was hilarious while it was going on! :) For those of us on the middle floor, anyway... :) At one point Ryan was out walking around the perimeter of the cabin, by the woods, trying to track down the bear - or prove the lack of one... :) Once the girls were busted, things quieted down, and sleep came over the house. :)

Sunday morning, we prepared breakfast, packed up and headed into Pigeon Forge. We spent all afternoon just piddling around - some rode go karts, some played mini-golf, and a ton of them got airbrushed t-shirts.

This was (boy)Nikki's t-shirt. It is absolutely awesome! :)

Then we headed back into Gatlinburg, and ate at Hard Rock. Then headed back down the mountain. In the middle of a pretty rough storm. I was sooooo thankful that I wasn't driving! We made it back to the church around 9...I think... We unloaded, got the kids off on their way, and then headed on our way.

I went and picked Chalupa up from Marcia - who was amazing enough to keep him while we were gone! :) He loves his aunt Marcia! :) And his cousin Shado! :) He thoroughly enjoyed his spend the night party, but I was very glad to see him when I got back! :) I sure had missed the little guy! :) Then I headed home, and crawled into bed, to sleep until 10:30 the next morning...I was bushed! :) But it was all completely worth it! :)

God has been moving all in and around these kids... I just can't wait to see what happens when they finally totally give up, and let Him have their lives completely! :) It's gonna rock their world - and will have such an impact on the worlds in which they live! It's gonna ROCK!!! :D

So...I had to update you on the trip...but now I have to update you on one other key thing that's happened since the last time I wrote... :)

God has blessed me greatly, and using a weekend in the mountains, He has begun to bind my heart with the one He has always intended for me to be with. :)

In a mere 18 days, my world has turned upside down - in a wonderful way! :) I have spent so many years dreaming of what this time would be like...and my dreams pale in comparison to everything that is happening! God has so richly blessed me! Everything that I have always needed and desired in a counterpart, He has provided in him. I am the happiest I have ever been! My heart is smiling like crazy, ALL the time! :) And it tends to spill over onto my face! :)

It is so true that his timing is always perfect. Never early. Never late. Always right on time. If this had happened a few months ago, I would have turned tail and ran. I wanted and desired a love like this, but I was not ready for it. But in His infinite wisdom, mercy and grace, He brought everything about in His perfect timing. :) And I couldn't be happier! :)

So, who is he? He's Ryan. The chaperone from the trip to Tennessee. The bear hunter. My pastor's nephew. :) And apparently, my pastor has thought for some time (even while I was in Texas), that Ryan and I would hit it off if we ever had the chance to meet. And, boy, was he ever right about that! :) The only glitch...he lives 3 hours away in LaFayette. But we have been able to be together both weekends since we've gotten back from Tennessee (last weekend I accompanied his momma and his brother's girlfriend up to LaFayette to attend a wedding in which Ryan and John - the brother - were a part of the wedding party.) and this weekend, he came up to Habersham.

His family is incredible, and I already feel very much a part of them. They have welcomed me right in, and for that I am so thankful! :) Things are going full speed ahead, and everyone around us have been so incredibly supportive. He gets to meet my family this Friday! :) He's coming back up to attend Friday night family date night (AKA: "Batson Mania")! :)

God is definitely leading, and I'm more than happy to follow. For the first time in my life... :) It's amazing what happens when you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God has sent you the man he has always intended you to be with.

I'll share this story, and then I'll wrap up this incredibly long update! :)

Back in July '09, God and I sat down and had a long talk about this whole future husband business. We made a list of the things that He had put in my future husband, things that I could look for and pray for. And then I requested not to date. :) I told Him that I had many other things I wanted to be doing, and did not care anything about spending my time dating lots of men to find the one for me. I asked Him to please let the next man that came into my life, be the one He had for me.

So, the Monday or Tuesday after our weekend in TN, when I came to the realization that there seemed to be something more than friendship here, I asked God for a sign. I asked him for a pink Gerber Daisy. I asked him to provide it through Ryan, if this was truly who He had intended for me. In my mind, I was thinking a bouquet of them, or something to that affect. So, I threw that out there, and waited. Went to LaFayette for the wedding, arrived at the wedding with Connie (Ryan's momma), and Leslie (John's girlfriend) a little early, while the wedding party was still taking pictures. And would you like to guess what flower was used as the boutonniere? Yep. Pink Gerber Daisies... :)

Anyway, at the current moment, I don't have any pictures of the two of us, but hope to take care of that Friday when he's here with me again. :) And then, I will share them with you all. :)

And, for those of you that already knew all of this information, and you're hearing it again for the 1,000th time...I'm sorry I've been gushing so much over the past 18 days... But you're support, encouragement, and willingness to listen means more to me than I could ever hope to express with the limited words I have. Thank you for loving me. :)

And to Ryan, my prince - thank you for being you. Thank you for being such a strong man of God. Thank you for listening first and foremost to Him, and for following his prompting and leading. Thank you for coming on the trip to TN, even though it didn't sound particularly appealing at the time. :) And thank you for the past 18 days. They have been among the best of my life...and as incredible as they have been, I know our journey is only just beginning. :) I love you. Forever.

A long awaited update :)

Again, I apologize for taking so very long to update. But I do have a very wonderful excuse for why my blogging has slacked off considerably - I am now LIVING the life God was telling me all about while I was in Texas, instead of just DREAMING about it! :) And I am enjoying almost every moment of it! :)

So...work

I am at the Target in Flowery Branch, and I am thoroughly enjoying it! I am still missing all my fellow employees from the Waco Target, but I am finding my place here, and loving it! I really do love Target - it is a great company to work for! :)

So...the youth :)

By far, my favorite topic these days - just ask my mama! :)

These kids are INCREDIBLE!!! I stand amazed every day, at how quickly they have become "mine." I feel like I have known them and been a part of their lives forever, and yet it's only been less than three months that I have really been with them!

The girls and I bonded very quickly, but the boys took a little longer. I gave them their space and their time, let them know I was interested in what is going on in their lives, and that I love them just as much as the girls, prayed, and waited. The girls were huggers from the get go, and a few of the boys would hug me whenever they saw me...but there were a few holding out. On Easter Sunday, the last one that had been holding out, held his arms out when I walked up to say good morning, and my heart soared! :)

I feel like a proud mama sitting back and watching these kids, and seeing how much they've grown and changed just in the very short time I've been around to watch them! God has AMAZING things in store for these kids!

We are planning a weekend away - "Spring Renewal" - June 4th - June 6th. We're taking the kids to a cabin in Tennesse! And I am thrilled! I cannot wait to see what God does with this weekend! Yay! :) You can be praying for us as we begin to tackle the preparations for the weekend! It's gonna be great! And thank you church, for providing the funds for the trip, so that the kids can be completely blessed and unburdened as they leave for this trip, and so that all of our kids can go! Last count, we have 23 going! :D This girl is THRILLED!!! :D

The kids and I have been working for the last two months, or so, on a drama, and we finally did it yesterday morning! I'm so proud of all the hard work that all of them put into it! Countless hours that they dedicated to practicing and planning, and it all definitely paid off! I've been told it was very good, and can't wait to see the video for myself! :)

The youth house is beginning to come out of its' shell! It is looking wonderful! Papa, Nanny, Dover, Marcia, and Mama have been awesome with helping me out to get everything finished! I NEVER could have gotten this much done without them! And again, I promise that as soon as it's finished, I'll take you on a "virtual tour" of the house! :) I'm excited for you all to see it with it's "finished face!" :)

So, life is going along pretty well! I am enjoying my family, my work, my church, my youth, and my life! God has surely blessed me abundantly more than I had ever hoped He would! But I still can't wait to see what's coming next! :)

Picture of the family, taken on Easter

An Evening to Remember...

So...once again, sorry it's been forever since I've written. One of these days, I will get better...hopefully! :)

On Sunday, March 28, the youth gathered for a wonderful evening filled with surprises, lessons, and lots of love and laughter. In October, when I found out that God was bringing me back to Georgia to take the youth pastor position at the church, He began to give me very clear vision of an evening He wanted the youth to experience.

The girls arrived at the church at 3p, and were met by Heath and I. We took them upstairs to the sanctuary, and I washed their feet while Heath explained to them the significance of what was happening. A physical example of how we want to serve them and walk alongside them. And then spoke a bit on what we're hoping will happen in the days, weeks, months and years to come.

After we finished, they were excused one by one, and Pastor Wes blessed and prayed for each of them.

They went downstairs, and were led into a classroom turned dressing room, where Joy, Traci, and Kim were waiting to fix the girls' hair, and crown them! :) But before they went into the hair chair, they were greeted with beautiful dresses (gathered over the previous 5 months by wonderful, helpful women of the church!). They changed, and then settled in to get beautiful! And did they ever look (and feel) beautiful! The glow on their faces, as they were prissing around in that room was worth all the effort, energy, time and money that went into the night alone! :)

While the girls were getting ready, the boys arrived at 4p, and went through the same thing the girls did, but with Heath washing and me talking.

After the girls were ready, they headed back up to the sanctuary to have pictures made. They all had an individual shot made, and then had a group shot taken as well.

When the boys were finished getting ready, they headed upstairs, and were greeted by excited clapping, whistling hoots and encouraging comments by the girls! They were grinning like opossums! (whatever that saying means...lol...anyway, they had HUGE grins on their faces!) They took their turn at having individual pictures made and then had their guy group picture made.

After that, we got the whole group picture and the stairwell shot! (Pictures are below... :) )

When the picture session was finished, the kids were dismissed from the sanctuary, and welcomed into a classroom turned dining room downstairs. When God had first given me the vision for the evening, He told me that we were to have a dinner, and that the table would be beautiful, set with lovely dishes and glasses. And that's when I started flipping out! I knew we'd have a sizable group, and I didn't know where I was going to get that many matching place settings... But of course, in typical God fashion, He quickly gave me the answer to that - the place settings were not supposed to be identical. As a matter of fact, the beauty of the table was that no place setting would be alike. The table would be a representation of God's love and acceptance for us. He doesn't love us because of how perfect and alike we are, but because of how unique and different we are! An amazing object lesson! :)

The footwashing was to symbolize how we come to God just as we are, and He cleans us up. Then, He gives us new clothes (the clothes they changed into), and we sit by His side as royalty. The evening was just packed full of physical representations of the things He had spent 16 months pouring into my heart and mind.

We ate dinner, and had a wonderful time enjoying fun and fellowship while eating! Marcia (my aunt) was amazing, and made the spaghetti and sweet tea for the dinner, and then came and took the lead in organizing and getting everything ready for meal time! She had the help of Diane Blackmon (our amazing friend that so willingly jumped right in and helped get everything together), Mama, Traci, Donna, Tony and Stacey - those two guys (Tony and Stacey) were INCREDIBLE!!! They helped from 2:15 until we were totally finished around 8! Great guys! All the wonderful kitchen help, served everything - got the drinks filled, and kept them filled; brought out the cesar salad, spaghetti, garlic bread and dessert (thanks to Traci for making the truffles to go with the "magic mousse"). Everything was wonderful!

After dinner, the kids were presented with their t-shirts, and excitedly changed into them and gathered down at the youth house to have their pictures made. Again. :)

The night was incredible! And God definitely showed up! And has continued to do so! But I want to keep this entry just about our special night, so I'll follow this one up with an update on everything else that's been going on! :)

Enjoy the pictures! :)

The girls' looking (and feeling) like beautiful princesses! :)

The boys looking (and feeling) pretty snazzy!

All of my incredible kids!

Back row: Amanda, Sammi, Jonathan, Nikki, Caitlin, Tanner, Olivia

Middle Row: Brittany, Harley, Josh, Alex, Alexx

Front Row: Nikki, Brittni, Abel

Pastor Wes, Heath, and I joined them all in a fun shot!

The stairwell shot - LOVE it! :)

Even though the kids were ready to kill me after having them pose so many times! :)

Brandy (Heath's wife) was incredible enough to take the pictures - she is a photographer - for us, and I took FULL advantage of it! There were over 150 pictures captured that evening! :) Most of them posed...which is why the kids were dying, but they were amazing, and humored me! :)

Here they all are, rocking the new youth t-shirts. They are posing in front of "The Breadth" wall in the youth house - as soon as the house is finished, I promise to post pictures of the entire thing! All we have left, is doing the final coat in the kitchen, the main bathroom, taking up the carpet throughout the house, putting down the floor in the kitchen, painting the outside, and various other small tasks that will make our house, a home! :)

The front...

And the back...with attitude! :)

It's been a while...

...but I'm going to skip right to last Thursday! :D (I'll catch you up on the last two months soon...hopefully! :D)

So, Thursday morning I was blow drying my hair, praying and thinking through all the happenings of Wednesday night's youth group, and asking Him where we are headed in the next few weeks. As I began to think through everything, I kept going back to some of the conversations I've had with the kids in the last several months, and the things God has shown me about the kids in our times together...

As I began thinking through things, I started asking Him how to explain why He allows bad things to happen to us as we go through life, and why He gave any of us free will to begin with...

In a moment, it all came pouring into my heart! And I have been SOOOOO excited ever since then! :D He's gooooooooooooooooooooooooood! :D

For a moment, I am going to need you all to have a bit of an imagination :)

Let's say, that I have made the decision that I am ready to get married. So, imagine with me, that I have the ability to CREATE my perfect husband. So, I get all my materials together, and began to put him together. So, I build him to be exactly how I want him. Then I every thought in his head that I ever want him to have. I fill his heart with every feeling I ever want him to feel. And then I breathe life into him, and we begin our life together.

He brings me flowers exactly when I feel that I need them. He says just the right thing at just the right time. He hugs me wheN I need a hug, kisses me when I need a kiss, just holds me and sits in silence with me when I need that. He is absolutely perfect... And I should be COMPLETELY fulfilled... But am I?

Absolutely NOT! :P

What fun would it be to be in a relationship where the only reason someone is with me is because I made them? It wouldn't be fun at all. Well...maybe for the first few weeks it would be fun... :)

So, as soon as that hit my heart, I finally got it! I understood why God gave us free will! :D What enjoyment would He get from relationships with us, if we only loved Him because He made us love Him? Made us talk to Him? Made us spend time with Him? There would be no enjoyment, and there would be no fulfillment.

If we didn't get to choose whether we wanted to be with Him, and invite Him to be a part of our lives, then He would not have the satisfaction that comes from us making the conscious choice to love Him because we WANT to!

Relationships are made stronger after hitting the rough patches, and coming out closer together and better than ever on the other side! :)

So, forget me creating my husband! I cannot wait for the day I get to unite with the perfectly, imperfect man that God chose for me, even before the world was created and Adam was crafted from the dust of the earth! :D Yay! :D

I'll be home for Christmas...

As I sat down to type this, Bing Crosby began to croon this song to me :) So I had to take advantage of that "God-incidence" and shout to the rooftops that I'LL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS IN ONLY 21 DAYS, AND BACK "FOR GOOD, FOR NOW" IN 60 DAYS!!! :D WOOHOO!!! :D


Ok...now that I have that out of my system, I can continue on! :)


I want to offer a public apology to all of you for the lack of blogs here lately. But here's the thing, I am soooooooooooooo wrapped up in all of my youth plans, that my mind has gotten quite one tracked! :) There is so much I would love to share with you, but as lots of it is still in the "polishing" stages, I don't want to put it out here yet, and then the HUGE thing I am clinching my hands hard to keep myself from spilling it all out here, I MUST keep off the blogosphere for a bit, because it is intended to be an awe-filled time, and I am afraid if I put it on here, some of my kids might get wind of it and it will take away from what all God has in store for that time - but not to worry, because you will get FULL details after it plays out! :D


***Please just be praying hard that EVERYTHING will come together just as it needs to! There are LOTS of "little things" - and some rather big things - that have to happen, and I am fully trusting that God is going to bring it all together...even if all of it doesn't come together until the day before...and then I'm just going to embrace the lesson He is teaching me in that... :) (Or try to at least...lol)



So...plans for the next 60 days:



I will fly into Atlanta at 10:15p on 12/23 (God-willing)



On 12/30, Heath is being so awesome as to allow me to lead out during our youth group time, and God has told me to simply let them in. Meaning that He just wants me to tell them who I am. Where I've come from; the life I've led; the paths I've walked; the things He's brought me through and the outcomes of them; and give them a glimpse or "overview" into the last 18 months of my life. (I know it sounds like a lot of info, but I promise youth group won't last 12 hours or anything... :D Although, I asked for permission to pull our start time back to 6, and we're going to eat together! :D I am soooooooooooo excited!!!)



My mama could tell you better than anyone, that I am sooooooooooooo excited!!! Our phone calls used to bounce all over the place, but now, I am single minded! There is only one thing on my thought process! I am continually bouncing ideas off of her, telling her of the newest ideas God's given me, and reading my weekly letter to her before emailing it to her to print out! :) She's been AWESOME through all this! She has been my hands in feet! :)



Next... :)



Well...technically, it's not next, as I got this one day while meditating on upcoming youth things... :)




God has laid a series on my heart to share with the youth when I get back. It's in the polishing stages, so I won't share all the details, but you should know me well enough to know my passion by now and this should come as no surprise - it's on the love of God and the relationship He so desires to have with us.



One day as I was at work, we (God and I) were having a running conversation, where I was throwing things at Him, and He was continually saying the same thing over and over and over and over. :) I was trying to figure out the best way to share the love of God with these kids, and help them to understand what it took me so long to figure out: He really does love us! Just because people that walk on this earth can't show us the full love of God, doesn't mean that He can't love us even more than that! As I was explaining to Him that some of these kids come out of situations that are very similar to mine - some much worse, some better - (for some reason, I just have this thing in me that takes over sometimes and forgets who He is, and that He knew all of it WAY before I did... :) I'm sure none of you have ANY idea how that is... ;) ) and how hard it is going to be for them to grasp this without some MAJOR help... And He just kept saying, "I am love. It all begins and ends with Me." And ya know...it's kind of hard to squabble with that logic...


However, me being me, I was exactly content with that simple explanation. So on the way home, as I was listening to Casting Crowns new CD (Until the Whole World Hears), I was listening to track 4: Joyful, Joyful. As I listened, it got to the bridge where the girl sings "God our father, Christ our brother..." And it all dropped into my heart like a ton of bricks! :)


You see, what He showed me that afternoon, was exactly what happened in my life for the first 23 years of my life...



But first...


God IS our father! You are His! And here comes the hardest part for me to grasp - before the creation of the world, you were on His mind! He LOVED you! He WANTED you! He DESIRED you! He CRAVED a relationship with you! And you are the only you He ever did or ever will create! You are COMPLETELY unique!




So, the picture is that God was thinking of you before the creation of the world, and like most new fathers, He has been waiting and waiting and waiting for your arrival in His world! He worked to make things just "so" for you - He opened His mouth and placed a beautiful, bright glowing ball of light to make your days bright! With clouds that He shaped, special for you, into whatever animal or shape you might be desiring at the moment! And then He filled the night sky with one giant moon, and trillions of stars to inspire your dreams!

Then He poured water onto the earth so that you would one day be able to swim in the ocean, walk on the sand and watch the sun set over the water - but that wasn't enough! He went and filled it with all kinds of living creatures that would entertain, amuse, and enrapture you!

Then He turned to the barren ground and put all sorts of things into the soil so that you would be surrounded by beauty all year round! Trees that will stay green all year long! Trees that have leaves that will change with the passing of the seasons - greens, yellows, reds, golds, browns! Then if the fact that they change color isn't enough, He made them so that they would float from the limbs, and fall all around you as you danced in the midst of them! Oh how He loves watching you dance among the falling leaves! :) He made them so they would "crunch" when you walked on them and you would laugh, and stomp them more! And He made them soft enough so that when they were piled up and you jumped in them, you would have a soft place to land!

But He didn't just stop with trees! He gave you bushes! Vines! And flowers! Making sure that there were all sorts of plant life, so you would be able to watch things bud and come to life all year long! He didn't want you to forget for one moment that life is everlasting, and that things are only brought to life when they are exposed to the Son! :) And He made sure that there were millions of colors to excite you! And He didn't just put flowers to look at! He put flowers you could play with! :) He sat in the heavens with a grin that split the clouds as you would search and search to find that perfect dandelion! And He laughed as you went chasing after it as it blew in the wind!

He gave you hours of enjoyment in the evenings of summer! You would wait and wait for the sun to begin to dip beyond the horizon, and would watch with eyes of an eagle, to see that first flash of light! You would beg your mama to get a jar and poke holes in the top of it, and you would run, giggle and fall all over the yard as you rushed to fill your jar! And oh the fun when you would finally capture one! To cup your hands together, and stick your eye ball to the "peephole" you made between your thumb and first finger to see just how awesome your find really was! :)

He gave you snow to play in! You could build things out of it! Make snow angels! Snowmen! Snowballs! Even ice cream made from snow! You would play out in it for HOURS, not even realizing that time was passing! And as He sat in the heavens and watched, He loved seeing your cheeks turn rosy and your eyes light up as you enjoyed every moment of the snow that had fallen! And oh boy! If you got to actually be out in it as it fell! How many snowflakes you would catch on your tongue! Twirling in the midst of the white beauty! :)

And of course there's rain! Rain to cleanse the earth! Rain to quench the thirst of all things living on the land! And how He loved to see you stomping in the puddles! Dancing in the rain! Not caring that your clothes were soaked through clear to your skin! Just loving this enormous gift He'd given you!

Oh...but along the way, something began to happen. A change so subtle that you wouldn't even realize it was happening...

The sun got too hot, the moon and stars didn't get bright enough or sparkle enough...

The beach got too hot, the sandy too messy, and the water too salty...

The leaves become a chore instead of a blessing...

The hedges needed shaping, the bushes needing pruning, and the flowers needed watering...

The lightning bugs lost their luster and instead of being a treasure, they became a nuisance...

The snow became irritating, and it kept you at home instead of on the go...

The rain made your hair frizzy and got spots on your clothes on the way into work...

Life happened.

Please, please, please - don't EVER stop enjoying the gifts He's blessed you with! Enjoy them and see them as precious! Bask in them!

There was a whole other "part" to what He shared with me that afternoon on the drive home... But I feel that tonight, He just wants you to focus on this.

Don't ever take His gifts for granted!

"People were bringing little children to Jesus to have Him touch them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, He was indignant. He said to them, 'Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will not enter it.' And He took the children in His arms, put His hands on them and blessed them."

Mark 10:13-16

Gobbled Blessings... :)

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

As I sit here this morning, in a house surrounded with sounds of the day of thanks, I sit in awe at all I have to be thankful for today. I always try to be thankful of everything in my life, and all that God has blessed me with, but this year, as I reflect, I have even more to be thankful for than ever before! :)

I have been waiting for over a month now to write this blog, but was waiting to share the news with Papa and Nanny, in person, before I put it out for the "blog-world" :) Tuesday night, I was able to take them to dinner, and in true God-humor, it just so happened that Tuesday marked the one month anniversary of when everything went into motion! :)

Let me start at the beginning... :)

On October 24th, I received an email from Pastor Wes. He was asking me to pray about it, and see if leading the youth group was something I felt that God was laying on my heart. When I read this email, I was not just shocked and surprised, but I was completely elated and totally overwhelmed! :) You see, my God is just too incredible for me!

If you all remember, several months ago I blogged about God laying on my heart a ministry for young girls/women, where I would be able to pour into them, all God has been pouring into me in the last 16ish months. When God laid that on my heart, I had already become perplexed, because someone was already working with the girls at our church, and I didn't know how I would ever fit into the youth picture. I had asked Him and asked Him how He was going to work it out. He told me to trust Him, and so finally, I sat back and took my little paws off of it - and lo and behold, in true God-fashion, that's when I received the email! :)

So, to say I was excited would be a HUGE understatement! :) Just ask my mama... :D

In the last month, God has been flooding my heart and mind with message series, events, vision, structure, etc for our group! And thankfully, He has provided me with INCREDIBLE partners and supporters for this journey, that have helped me keep afloat! :)

Heath, my co-leader, and an INCREDIBLE communicator and man of the Word, is taking wonderful care of the kids right now, and is pouring into them and feeding them so much of the meat of the Word - it's just awesome! He has been awesome enough to allow me to send weekly letters to them, (and thanks to Mama who prints them out for me and delivers them to the youth house each Wednesday night!) and through that, I have already gotten to know several of the youth by them contacting me via email and text and sharing their lives with me! :) It has been simply incredible! :)

I sit here, in Texas, and wonder why in the world God won't just let me go ahead and head on back to Georgia, when all this awesomeness is going on! One day He finally allowed me to see why I'm still here - you see, if you know me at all, you'll know what I am about to say is completely and absolutely, without a doubt the truth: If I had been in Georgia, at the church, when Pastor Wes asked me to take on the youth, I would have jumped in wholeheartedly with my whole body - not just both my feet! And I probably would have been able to make it work for a while, but I would have lost steam soon. However, with doing it in God's timing, and in His way, I am being given the opportunity to just soak Him up, listening to the beat of His heart for His children, and have been given time to lay things out, plan ahead (fully) for different events and messages, and I have also been given this time to get to know the children, and for them to get to know me, without all the awkwardness of just showing up one day unannounced and taking over! :) Now, I already feel connected to these guys, so that when I show up on 12/30 (while I'm home for Christmas, I get to attend the youth service! Soooooooooooooooooooo excited!), I'll feel like I already know some of these kids, and since they already know a bit about me, we can just enjoy the time of fellowship and move right along! :)

God is sooooooooooooooooo good! :)

So today, on this Thanksgiving day, I am thankful for my family and friends that love me in spite of all my faults and shortcomings, my youth group that I cannot wait to get home and get in the middle of, my Jesus who gave His life to save mine, and my God that gave up His son, so that He might gain this daughter! :)

He loves you so very much! Don't EVER forget it! :)

And I love you so very much! Don't ever forget that either! :)

Happy Thanksgiving!

Roll me, Pound me, Spin me, Bake me, Paint me, Rebake me :)

Mama shared this with me, and now I'm going to share it with all of you! :)

There was a couple who took a trip to England to shop in a beautiful antique store to celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary.

The both liked antiques and pottery, and especially teacups. Spotting an exceptional cup, they asked "May we see that? We've never seen a cup quite so beautiful."

As the lady handed it to them, suddenly the teacup spoke, "You don't understand. I have not always been a teacup. There was a time when I was just a lump of red clay.

My master took me and rolled me, pounded and patted me over and over and I yelled out, 'Don't do that! I don't like it! Let me alone!' but he only smiled, and gently said, 'Not yet.'

Then, WHAM! I was placed on a spinning wheel and suddenly I was spun around and around and around. 'Stop it! I'm getting so dizzy! I'm going to be sick!' I screamed. But the master only nodded and said quietly, 'Not yet.'

He spun me and poked and prodded and bent me out of shape to suit himself and then... Then he put me in the oven! I have never felt such hear! I yelled and knocked and pounded at the door, 'Help! Get me out of here!' I could see him through the opening and I could read his lips as he shook his head from side to side, 'Not yet.'

When I thought I couldn't bear it another minute, the door opened. He carefully took me out and put me on the shelf and I began to cool. Oh, that felt so good! 'Ah! This is much better,' I thought. But after I cooled, he picked me up and he brushed and painted me all over. The fumes were horrible, I thought I would gag. 'Oh! Please stop it! Stop!' I cried. He only shook his head and said, 'Not yet.'

Then suddenly, he put me back into the oven. Only it was not like the first one - this was twice as hot and I just knew I would suffocate. I begged! I pleaded! I screamed! I cried! I was convinced I would never make it. I was ready to give up, when the door opened and he took me out and again placed me on the shelf, where I cooled and waited, and waited, wondering, 'What's he going to do to me next?'

An hour later he handed me a mirror and said, 'Look at yourself.' And I did. I said, 'That's not me. That couldn't be me. It's beautiful. I'm beautiful!'

Quietly, he spoke, 'I want you to remember, then,' he said, 'I know it hurt to be rolled and pounded and patted, but had I just left you alone, you'd have dried up.

I know it made you dizzy to spin around on the wheel, but if I had stopped, you would have crumbled.

I know it hurt and it was hot and disagreeable in the oven, but if I hadn't put you there, you would have cracked.

I know the fumes were bad when I brushed and painted all over you, but if I hadn't done that, you never would have hardened. You would not have had any color in your life.

If I hadn't put you back in that second oven, you woudn't have survived for long, because the hardness would not have held.

Now you are a finished product. Now you are what I had in mind when I first began with you.'

So...whatcha think? :) I, personally, think that I've been this little lump of clay many times during my lifetime.

During the last sixteen and a half months, I have been rolled, pounded, spun, baked, painted, and rebaked. And every time we get one area of me finished, it's time to start working on another area.

At first, I just got frustrated; angry even. I felt like I was doing my best, allowing God to have a bigger say in my life than I had ever allowed Him to. I was listening, praying, reading, obeying...but every time I got one thing down, He seemed to spotlight another area where I had failed yet again.

Then one day, I woke up... :)

Yes, there were/are many "failing" areas in my life. But the thing is, that they fail because I am trying to control them. It isn't that God sees me as a failure, it is just that when I begin to take the steering wheel away from Him because I think I can handle it better, whatever it is, begins to slowly (and sometimes not so slowly...) go downhill. He doesn't want me to feel like a failure, He wants me to live a life filled with freedom and forgiveness!!! :)

I sit here and remember back to that Saturday night/Sunday morning in late July when I was at the end of my rope. I was like that little teacup sitting in the oven: I was DONE! I didn't want to do it anymore, and as I sat on the inside, not being able to see the whole picture, but instead only seeing out the little foggy window that looked out into the place I was currently in, I got angry. "Why would you put these things on my heart if you aren't going to do anything with them?" "Why did you give me such a great family, take me 1000 miles away from them, give me 12 months of contentment, and then make my heart burn to be back with them - daily - again?" "Why leave me here all alone this summer, except for visits from Mama and Marcia, when I could have just moved home and been with all of them consistently?" "Why, God?" "Why?"

And in that moment, thankfully, He didn't simply say "Not yet." Instead He gave me a tentative window for when I'd be home, and loved on me.

But still, I wasn't completely satisfied. Because as the family got back home from their summer excursions, and we settled back into life, I wasn't content. We were adjusting to a new normal, and with Sharon and David being around all the time instead of being at class, I just didn't understand why God wasn't just sending me on home right that instant. "Why do I need to stay here?" "Why can't I just pack up and go back right now?" "Why would you give me a peace to release the children, and then make me stay here for six more months?" "Why are the days and weeks so long? Couldn't you make them speed up?" "Why do you keep bringing things to my heart, that are completely impossible?"

Oh yes. What the human mind is capable of misunderstanding when we don't stay completely focused.

I finally gave in...gave up...shut up... However you wanna put it... :) I told Him, "Yes. Yes to whatever you have for me, whenever you have it for me. I don't want to rush things, because I know you're timing is perfect, so I will try my best to just sit down, shut up and hang on for the ride. But may I ask one thing? Could you help me to do that? :)" And He did.

And lo and behold, just when I thought the things I had heard had just been straight out of my overactive imagination, He pulled out the photo album and showed me the big picture! :)

He put the dream right in my lap, and showed me clearly how if He had listened to my suggestions at any point, how things wouldn't have turned out as they were supposed to. Everything happens for a reason, and I know that more tonight than I did a week ago. :)

God is good...

ALL the time!

But the thing through all of this, is to realize that just because He doesn't always work exactly like we want Him to, it does not mean that we are to stop talking to Him and telling Him what is on our hearts and what we long for. You see, God put a passion in my heart. I grabbed hold of it, and wanted it to come to fruition a while back, but it wasn't supposed to happen that way. The end result is still the same in both of our scenarios - only with His way of doing things, the entire experience will be a LOT better, because sometimes, the path way to the project will teach you more and grow you more than the project itself! :)

Sorry for rambling so much - it's just been an awesome week!!! :D

Love you all! :)

PS - Please go back up to the top of the post and look closely at the picture. What do you notice? Are his hands spotless and free of mess? Absolutely not! And what does that tell us?

God is not afraid of our messes! He will get right in it with us, to help us out of it! He isn't going to just stand high above you and point out what needs to be fixed, broken away, or tweaked - he's going to get right there beside you, and do it for you, Himself! All you have to do is open yourself up! He isn't going to make you become a finished product, full of beauty and life. But it sure hurts His heart to have to sit on His hands and watch as you run further and further from Him. Run back! The process might be painful at times, but you'll have an eternity filled with peace and joy and the most awesome worship service you've ever experienced!!! :D Or, you can fill yourself up with what you think is peaceful now, and wind up with an eternity of misery, sadness, and heartbreak, knowing that if you'd only turned into His arms, you could be forever in them...

He is filled with love, and He wants to pour it all over you! :) Let Him.

Every moment matters...

So, last night Davis and I had a sleepover (Samantha had gone with a friend to something at her church and didn't get back until later). The stipulations of the sleepover were that we had to be in the bed at 7:45 (yuck!) and have the lights off by 8 (double yuck!) - we followed both those rules...but you can still have fun talking! :)

Anyway, we had some quality conversation and cuddle time, and then when his words began to get further and further apart, and he was yawning every other breath, I just got quiet, and soon he was out like a light. He had been holding my hand when he was talking, and he continued to hold it as he was sleeping. We had been lying on our sides facing each other while we'd been talking, and the sounder he went to sleep, the more burrowed into me he became - still holding my hand.

As I laid there, Davis pressing into me on one side, and Spooky pressing in on the other, I breathed it in deeply. Cause that's truly what it's all about. Those are life's beautiful moments. It didn't matter that lots of things got left undone because we had to lay down and have the lights out by 8, it didn't matter that I didn't get the reading, journaling, blogging, emailing, etc done that I had planned to do last night before he came in asking if we could have a sleepover. It didn't matter that as I laid there sandwiched between them that I felt like my skin was going to melt off cause I was so hot, and I couldn't get my hands loose to throw the cover off. All that mattered was lying there and enjoying that precious time with that child. Cause those moments are gone all too soon...

As I think to all the times during his life (and Samantha's) that I've had the opportunities to love on them, hold them, cuddle them, hug them, kiss them, breathe them in...I sit back in awe. Because here's the truth of it. I love these kids. I love them with every breath that is in me. I want them to have the very best this world has to offer, and the best God has in store for them. I want them to grasp every concept way earlier than I did, I don't want them to hurt, but when they do, I hurt with them. I get upset with them when they don't obey, and get frustrated when I know/see/hear them doing things they shouldn't be doing, but I love them even through that.

...How much more does God do all of that with each of us?

Just sit on that one a minute.

God loves you so much, he aches for you. He wants to be a part of your life. He doesn't just want you to talk to Him during set times of "quiet time" or "prayer time" but He wants you to include Him ALL day long! He's even better than WalMart, cause He doesn't even close on major holidays! 24/7/365 - He's there for YOU!!! He wants to hear YOUR voice! Singing, praying, rambling, processing - He doesn't care! Think of the times where you have just sat in the same room with your children and/or parents - aren't there times when nothing has to even be said - you're just in their presence, and that's more than enough! He's the GOD OF THE UNIVERSE!!! And yet, He still wants that with each of us! He just wants us to welcome Him into our presence, and He wants us to long to be in His!

His arms are open wide!
RUN IN!!!

And the best part is, that just like the picture above, He doesn't expect us to come up to Him - He gets right down here with us, and embraces us right where we are! We don't have to be perfect! We don't have to be be mistake-free! We just have to want Him and desire Him more than we want or desire anything else! (And the beautiful thing there is, that even if you're not completely to that point, all you have to do is let Him know you'd like to get there, and He'll even help you with that!)

What an incredible Daddy He is!!! :D

Rest in His arms this week . Don't worry. Don't fret. He wrote, directed, produced, and previewed the movie that is your life - so if you have issues, take them to Him! :)

I love you all!

And the answer is...

Well, some of you knew...and some of you didn't... But, whatever the case may be...there I am, in all my glory! :)

Fifteen years, and another world ago... :)

Kudos to you if you can pick out which of these lovely young children of the early 90's is me... :)
(Family picking doesn't count - cause if you can't find me, then we have more pressing issues... :P )

A friend posted this picture on Facebook, and I spent a good long while laughing, and then went down memory lane for a bit. Oh...the good ol' days... :)

Tomato juice and chocolate cake... Mmmmmm... :)

Last night I had the opportunity to enjoy comfort foods that best remind me of home, and Friday nights at Papa and Nanny's.

It was a most excellent, God-blessed moment.

'Nuf said. :)

Standing in a garage does not make you a car...

So, Marcia passed on an email today. I'd like to share the content with you, and then share my thoughts (of course! :D )...

My First Day In Heaven

I was shocked, confused, bewildered

As I entered Heaven's door,

Not by the beauty of it all,

Nor the lights or its decor.

But it was the folks in Heaven

Who made me sputter and gasp --

The thieves, the liars, the sinners

The alcoholics and the trash.

There stood the kid from seventh grade

Who swiped my lunch money! Twice.

Next to him was my old neighbor

Who never said anything nice.

Herb, who I always thought

Was rotting away in hell,

Was sitting pretty on cloud nine,

Looking incredibly well.

I nudged Jesus, 'What's the deal?

I would love to hear your take.

How'd all these sinners get up here?

God must've made a mistake!

And why's everyone so quiet,

So somber - give me a clue.'

'Hush, child' He said, 'they're all in shock.

No one thought they'd be seeing you.'

Remember...Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian,

any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.

Every saint has a past...

Every sinner has a future!!!

To say that I am currently jazzed up, would be quite the understatement! :) How powerful the concept is!!! For the last...5 years, I think...I have attended churches that are not the "traditional" churches I attended in years before.

Meaning:

- No Sunday School

- No Sunday night services

- Wednesday night church is non-existent, or is a Bible study type deal rather than the traditional "service"

- No choir

Warning: The following is my opinion I do not expect everyone to agree with it, nor will I be angry if you think I'm crazy for thinking the way I do. It it simply the way I feel. :)

Let me start by saying, that as a person that always loved being a part of the choir, and all the fellowship that that involved, not having a choir was by far the hardest thing to adjust to - but I've adjusted :)

As far as Sunday School goes, you can ask Mama...I never cared very much for it. I used to go to the Single Women's class (when I was a child, and in the beginning of my teenage years) to avoid going into the class I was supposed to because of all the drama that was involved in those classes. And then when I got "of age," I began working in the nursery during the Sunday School hour, so I didn't have to go to Sunday School.

I'm certain everyone has not had the experience I have had, but, to my recollection, every Sunday School class I have ever been in - that was "age appropriate" - didn't do very much for me. The first half of the time was spent gossiping and filled with negativity. Then when the books were finally brought out, we would all go around the room, taking turns reading verses, spit out our "Sunday School Answers," say some empty prayer about God blessing everything and everyone, and off we'd go to church.

No one was transparent. No one talked about the real things in their life. Everyone spent more time talking about others, than they did sharing what was really on their heart. It wasn't a "safe space" and it wasn't a place for growth. Sunday school was simply something I did, because I was made to - because that was what was expected. If we had not gone to Sunday School while we went to a church that offered Sunday School - because we weren't getting anything out of it - we would have been ostracized by many.

The "go to church every time the doors are opened" theme is rampant back home, and personally, it drives me nuts. DO NOT HEAR ME INCORRECTLY, I am NOT saying that you shouldn't go to church when given the opportunity. However, going JUST BECAUSE IT IS WHAT IS EXPECTED is no better than not going at all.

There were many, many times that I was drug to church seething venom all the way, because I absolutely did not want to go, for whatever reason. Am I saying that Mama was wrong in making me go? No. But did it do me any good to go? No. If I am filled with anger, hurt, or just plain ignorance and stupidity, it is imperative that you take the time to sit down and deal with the issues I'm experiencing before you try to take me to church. If my heart is closed off because of something affecting it, it isn't going to be open to anything else coming in until the current "house guest" is booted out!

So many times, I think we get our eyes off the big picture, and worry too much about appearances.

You are not going to Hell, or be "knocked down a rung" for any of the following:

Keeping your newborn baby at home for the first month or two after he is born, rather than bringing him to church.

#1 - If you are sitting with your newborn in church, how much attention are you paying anyway?

#2 - All those germy people have no business being all up around your baby trying to give him Piggy Flu

#3 - If you have a newborn, you're probably running on little sleep - so how much attention are you paying?

Staying at home when you are sick, or just feeling puny in general.

#1 - If you're sick...STAY AT HOME! I would prefer you to miss one service, and be back 100% the next one, than to come to this service - just so you can say you came - and pass on your germ to the rest of us!

#2 - If you feel puny, stay home! If you're extremely tired, or if you just feel like you're not up to par, it's ok not to come to church. You can worship God right where you are! Because the deal isn't just "press on through and go to church." The problem is, that you have to get up, get dressed, drive to church, if you have Sunday School, you have to go to that, because if you go to one and not the other, you'll be talked about for that too, go to church - if you're in the choir, you have to sing, because "if you can make it to church, why can't you sing in the choir?" But it's still not over - you have to eat, so since you're already up, you just need to come on and go out to eat with us after church like we always do."

No. NO. NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!

Those words might all come out of the mouths of the people that sit next to you at church, but they are lies straight from the pit of hell!!!

Now I come straight from the woman that talked to one of her nurses (this was many years ago) who called her, vomitting, from a payphone to tell her she wasn't going to be able to do any more visits that day, and Mama talked to her until she had stopped vomitting, and was "feeling so much better." By the grace of God, Mama could count on one hand the days she's missed work in her lifetime because she was sick (she's missed more days because something was wrong with me - my back surgery, emergency appendectomy, lithotripsy, etc . - and when she had to miss with me, she always went in after hours and made up for whatever she'd missed). The lady is not a slacker - in any sense of the word - but she even recognizes that there are times when it is simply time to give your body a break. Go to bed earlier. Sleep in later. Lift your finger for nothing. RELAX!

And if my mama can recognize that, then you better believe God can! And you wanna know why? BECAUSE HE SEES THE BIG PICTURE!!! He sees your heart! Going to church is not about impressing the people in your sunday school class, or in your church, or in the choir. It is about fellowship (being in God's presence and being on a "heart level," not gossiping) with other believers, worshipping with other saints, and soaking up all God has for you! Because..."where two or three are gathered..." :D God knows what's going on inside of you. I can guarantee you, that there have been Sunday's He's shown Himself much clearer to a person sick and in bed than He has to a person sitting in a pew because that's where they're supposed to be on Sundays.

*Hopping off my soapbox...*

In other news... :D

I have to tell you how excited I got yesterday!!! Mama got me a BEAUTIFUL (it's pink and chocolate colored!) Life Application Bible for my birthday! She's had one for a while, and I've enjoyed being able to read the extras over the years from her's, but a couple of months ago, I decided I wanted one of my own, so I could dig deeper in my own Bible, and have it all right here with me.

I started on Matthew yesterday afternoon, and I am sooooooooooooooo excited!!!

You see, as a child, sermons didn't always hold my attention... So I would open my Bible and read Ruth. It was just long enough to fill the time, but short enough that I could finish it before the sermon was over. And every time I read her story, I fell more in love with it. I never knew why I felt such a connection to Ruth, but she's always been my favorite woman in the Bible. Her story is fresh and new each time I read it!

Anyway, I began reading Matthew yesterday, and the first exciting news was that I finally understand why he lists everybody and His brother at the beginning of the book... :) The LAB explained how Matthew was writing the book to the Jews, and he was writing out the geneology from Abraham (the father of their faith) to Jesus, to prove He was who He said He was. (But when Luke wrote it out, he was writing to the Gentiles, so he traced it back to Adam, to prove that Jesus came for all people.)

"Salmon the father of Boaz, whose mother was Rahab,

Boaz the father of Obed, whose mother was Ruth,

Obed the father of Jesse,

and Jesse the father of King David.

David was the father of Solomon, whose mother had been Uriah's wife."

~Matthew 1:5-6

This scripture makes me POSITIVELY GIDDY!!!!!! Do you get it???

The first thing is, if Ruth had not followed the path God had for her, and obeyed the words that were spoken over her, Obed wouldn't have existed...and therefore Jesse wouldn't have come, and neither would King David - the man after God's own heart... :D :D :D :D :D

And then, if that doesn't just beat all, let's take it one step further, and note that not only is King David part of Jesus' "family tree," but SO IS BATHSHEBA!!! :D :D :D :D :D Not that I'm thrilled about what David or Bathsheba did, but to see, so very, very clearly, that God didn't make sure that His son was coming from a line of "perfect people." BECAUSE THAT WOULDN'T BE POSSIBLE ANYWAY!!! Because we're human!!! :D

What I'm trying to get at, is the fact that Jesus didn't come just to save the people that bathe daily, wear their very best to church, sit up straight with legs crossed, carry their Bible under their arm, and only associate with others that do the very same.

He also came for the people that only bathe when they can find a water source, or when the rains come down from Heaven, consider their best to be a shirt that only has a few small holes and stains, slouch as far into their seat as they can, have never touched a Bible, and hang out at bars.

We have to get over ourselves! Just because we have already gotten it, doesn't mean that we're any better than those who haven't! They are still people! And they are still God's children - even if they choose to turn their back on Him! And don't you think it breaks His heart when we treat His precious children like they are beneath us, or that they are not worthy, or worse yet, we simply pretend that they don't exist?!?!?!

..."Jesus loves the little children, ALL the children of the world, red and yellow, black and white, they are precious in His site, Jesus loves the little children of the world..."

The song came to my head, and now God has given me a picture to go with it. The "world" in the song can mean what we've always accepted it to mean - that He loves all the little kids from all the different countries on earth. Or we can take it to mean what He really wants us to understand! :D

Ready?

I'm 24, and to my mama, I am still her child. I will be her child until the day I die. She will never see me as not being her child. And that's exactly how God is! The little children in the story, represent every human on the planet, and the "world" is exactly that - it is the world that has trapped His precious children, and the world He wants to save them from!!! WOOHOO!!!! How awesome is that?!?!?!?!?!?!?! :)

I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO super excited!!!

Look how GREAT my God is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

Love you all! :)