Roll me, Pound me, Spin me, Bake me, Paint me, Rebake me :)

Mama shared this with me, and now I'm going to share it with all of you! :)

There was a couple who took a trip to England to shop in a beautiful antique store to celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary.

The both liked antiques and pottery, and especially teacups. Spotting an exceptional cup, they asked "May we see that? We've never seen a cup quite so beautiful."

As the lady handed it to them, suddenly the teacup spoke, "You don't understand. I have not always been a teacup. There was a time when I was just a lump of red clay.

My master took me and rolled me, pounded and patted me over and over and I yelled out, 'Don't do that! I don't like it! Let me alone!' but he only smiled, and gently said, 'Not yet.'

Then, WHAM! I was placed on a spinning wheel and suddenly I was spun around and around and around. 'Stop it! I'm getting so dizzy! I'm going to be sick!' I screamed. But the master only nodded and said quietly, 'Not yet.'

He spun me and poked and prodded and bent me out of shape to suit himself and then... Then he put me in the oven! I have never felt such hear! I yelled and knocked and pounded at the door, 'Help! Get me out of here!' I could see him through the opening and I could read his lips as he shook his head from side to side, 'Not yet.'

When I thought I couldn't bear it another minute, the door opened. He carefully took me out and put me on the shelf and I began to cool. Oh, that felt so good! 'Ah! This is much better,' I thought. But after I cooled, he picked me up and he brushed and painted me all over. The fumes were horrible, I thought I would gag. 'Oh! Please stop it! Stop!' I cried. He only shook his head and said, 'Not yet.'

Then suddenly, he put me back into the oven. Only it was not like the first one - this was twice as hot and I just knew I would suffocate. I begged! I pleaded! I screamed! I cried! I was convinced I would never make it. I was ready to give up, when the door opened and he took me out and again placed me on the shelf, where I cooled and waited, and waited, wondering, 'What's he going to do to me next?'

An hour later he handed me a mirror and said, 'Look at yourself.' And I did. I said, 'That's not me. That couldn't be me. It's beautiful. I'm beautiful!'

Quietly, he spoke, 'I want you to remember, then,' he said, 'I know it hurt to be rolled and pounded and patted, but had I just left you alone, you'd have dried up.

I know it made you dizzy to spin around on the wheel, but if I had stopped, you would have crumbled.

I know it hurt and it was hot and disagreeable in the oven, but if I hadn't put you there, you would have cracked.

I know the fumes were bad when I brushed and painted all over you, but if I hadn't done that, you never would have hardened. You would not have had any color in your life.

If I hadn't put you back in that second oven, you woudn't have survived for long, because the hardness would not have held.

Now you are a finished product. Now you are what I had in mind when I first began with you.'

So...whatcha think? :) I, personally, think that I've been this little lump of clay many times during my lifetime.

During the last sixteen and a half months, I have been rolled, pounded, spun, baked, painted, and rebaked. And every time we get one area of me finished, it's time to start working on another area.

At first, I just got frustrated; angry even. I felt like I was doing my best, allowing God to have a bigger say in my life than I had ever allowed Him to. I was listening, praying, reading, obeying...but every time I got one thing down, He seemed to spotlight another area where I had failed yet again.

Then one day, I woke up... :)

Yes, there were/are many "failing" areas in my life. But the thing is, that they fail because I am trying to control them. It isn't that God sees me as a failure, it is just that when I begin to take the steering wheel away from Him because I think I can handle it better, whatever it is, begins to slowly (and sometimes not so slowly...) go downhill. He doesn't want me to feel like a failure, He wants me to live a life filled with freedom and forgiveness!!! :)

I sit here and remember back to that Saturday night/Sunday morning in late July when I was at the end of my rope. I was like that little teacup sitting in the oven: I was DONE! I didn't want to do it anymore, and as I sat on the inside, not being able to see the whole picture, but instead only seeing out the little foggy window that looked out into the place I was currently in, I got angry. "Why would you put these things on my heart if you aren't going to do anything with them?" "Why did you give me such a great family, take me 1000 miles away from them, give me 12 months of contentment, and then make my heart burn to be back with them - daily - again?" "Why leave me here all alone this summer, except for visits from Mama and Marcia, when I could have just moved home and been with all of them consistently?" "Why, God?" "Why?"

And in that moment, thankfully, He didn't simply say "Not yet." Instead He gave me a tentative window for when I'd be home, and loved on me.

But still, I wasn't completely satisfied. Because as the family got back home from their summer excursions, and we settled back into life, I wasn't content. We were adjusting to a new normal, and with Sharon and David being around all the time instead of being at class, I just didn't understand why God wasn't just sending me on home right that instant. "Why do I need to stay here?" "Why can't I just pack up and go back right now?" "Why would you give me a peace to release the children, and then make me stay here for six more months?" "Why are the days and weeks so long? Couldn't you make them speed up?" "Why do you keep bringing things to my heart, that are completely impossible?"

Oh yes. What the human mind is capable of misunderstanding when we don't stay completely focused.

I finally gave in...gave up...shut up... However you wanna put it... :) I told Him, "Yes. Yes to whatever you have for me, whenever you have it for me. I don't want to rush things, because I know you're timing is perfect, so I will try my best to just sit down, shut up and hang on for the ride. But may I ask one thing? Could you help me to do that? :)" And He did.

And lo and behold, just when I thought the things I had heard had just been straight out of my overactive imagination, He pulled out the photo album and showed me the big picture! :)

He put the dream right in my lap, and showed me clearly how if He had listened to my suggestions at any point, how things wouldn't have turned out as they were supposed to. Everything happens for a reason, and I know that more tonight than I did a week ago. :)

God is good...

ALL the time!

But the thing through all of this, is to realize that just because He doesn't always work exactly like we want Him to, it does not mean that we are to stop talking to Him and telling Him what is on our hearts and what we long for. You see, God put a passion in my heart. I grabbed hold of it, and wanted it to come to fruition a while back, but it wasn't supposed to happen that way. The end result is still the same in both of our scenarios - only with His way of doing things, the entire experience will be a LOT better, because sometimes, the path way to the project will teach you more and grow you more than the project itself! :)

Sorry for rambling so much - it's just been an awesome week!!! :D

Love you all! :)

PS - Please go back up to the top of the post and look closely at the picture. What do you notice? Are his hands spotless and free of mess? Absolutely not! And what does that tell us?

God is not afraid of our messes! He will get right in it with us, to help us out of it! He isn't going to just stand high above you and point out what needs to be fixed, broken away, or tweaked - he's going to get right there beside you, and do it for you, Himself! All you have to do is open yourself up! He isn't going to make you become a finished product, full of beauty and life. But it sure hurts His heart to have to sit on His hands and watch as you run further and further from Him. Run back! The process might be painful at times, but you'll have an eternity filled with peace and joy and the most awesome worship service you've ever experienced!!! :D Or, you can fill yourself up with what you think is peaceful now, and wind up with an eternity of misery, sadness, and heartbreak, knowing that if you'd only turned into His arms, you could be forever in them...

He is filled with love, and He wants to pour it all over you! :) Let Him.